Ahoy me hearties, shiver me timbers and splice the mainbrace! Now’s time for a hearty sea shanty, all in honour of a new London fish joint: Parsons. And if you’re in need of some instrumental accompaniment…

 

 

What shall we do with the cats on Twitter
Skating on ice and surfing on litter?
They’re even crazier than those on Insta
With their somersaultin’.

There’s even some that do Gangnam-style
While all lined up in single file,
Captured on video by cat-ophiles
With a mild obsession.

With all these owners and their fervor
In uploading photos to the server,
Can the Internet go any further
Before crashing without warnin’?

So I’ve hatched a plan to keep them quiet:
Give ‘em some fish, I’m sure they’ll like it.
Better than Whiskas, good for their diet.
Soon they’ll be a snorin’.

But it’s fish from Parsons or some name similar,
(Or maybe it’s Sarsons? No, that’s malt vinegar.)
It’s definitely Parsons – I’m already missing ya,
For it’s my favourite fish in London.

It’s just a little place whose walls have tiles,
Serving fresh fish with friendly smiles.
A nice little place to spend a while
When in Covent Garden.

Salt-cod fritters and a manzanilla:
Served together, it’s a panacea
For all those cats on social media.
Starters I’m adorin’.

Proper-cooked chips from the deep-fat fryer:
Fluffy in the centre, crispy on the outside.
Eat them all to your heart’s desire
With vinegar for pourin’.

Creamy fish pie is such a cockle-warmer:
Scraping out morsels from each corner.
It’s comfort food that soothes any trauma
And send your heart a soarin’.

So I’m not gonna share with a mangy feline
Fish so good, I’m floating on cloud nine.
The plan seemed sound, but now I’m resigned
To endless cats skateboardin’.

So what shall we do with the cats on Twitter
Skating on ice and surfing on litter?
They’re even crazier than ones on Insta
With their somersaultin’.

*

 

London fish suppers aren’t the only topic for songs and poetry on this blog. If you like this post, feel free to check out my Masterchef Poem and my Ode to 80’s food.

 

London fish supper at Parsons